Tuesday, 29 March 2011

TiramiAWESOME

Days off bore me. I should spend them writing, but obviously I wouldn't be a World Class Procastinator if I did that, would I? Usually I clean, but today I'd already done that. So I made Tiramisu.

Obviously.

I decided to experiment, though. Nice as ladyfingers are (I'll wait while you stop making highly amusing jokes), they go a bit soggy at the bottom of a Tiramisu, so I decided not to use them. I substituted them with dark chocolate digestive biscuits, because they're amazing and, let's be honest, more chocolate in a Tiramisu? Great idea.

Here's what they looked like;

(Those are bloody big wine glasses, BTW)

And here's how to make it. You'll need;
  • 4 egg yolks
  • 50g sugar
  • 1 pack (yes, one full pack) of dark chocolate digestives
  • 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract
  • 250g marscapone cheese
  • a big pot of strong black coffee  



Making them is really simple. Put the yolks, sugar and vanilla extract together in a bowl and whisk until they form a smooth, pale yellow mixture that looks a little like this;


Once you've done that, set the mixture aside. Now comes the fun parts. Take those biscuits and smash the hell out of them. I used a hammer. Nice and therapeutic. Once smashed, put them in a bowl and start to mix in the coffee. Do it slowly; you want the biscuit to absord the liquid and stick together, but you don't want to drown it/make it go soggy. There should still be crunch there when you eat it.

(Mmm coffee and chocolate mmm)

All that's left to do now is serve it. Layer the two mixtures into whatever you've serving it in, with the biscuit at the bottom. I did three layers of each. After you're finished put the glasses (or whatever) into the fridge to chill for a couple of hours, then eat the leftovers. And all that coffee that you've got left over? Drink it. It's fricking coffee.

That's all there is to it. If you make them, let me know how they turn out.  

Wednesday, 23 March 2011

Spectral Press Book Trailer

Back in January I wrote about Spectral Press, a micro-press producing extremely limited chapbooks. At the weekend they released a book trailer for the second of their chapbooks, Gary Fry's Abolisher Of Roses (available in May). which you can order from their website for the more-than-reasonable price of £3.50 (or £13.50 for a four chapbook subscription). The first book, What They Hear In The Dark, is also still available to order.

Here's the trailer;

Tuesday, 22 March 2011

Homefront - Songs For The Resistance

In a bid to promote Homefront - a game being touted as the game that will make you forget about Call Of Duty: Black Ops - THQ are giving away 25,000 digital copies of the soundtrack to the game, an album of war-themed covers. I managed to bag one, and I figure I've got nothing better to do than to break it down track-by-track.

1. As I Lay Dying - War Ensemble
I don't like Slayer. I've never liked Slayer. This is a pretty by-the-numbers cover, with the exception of the vocals which are given the As I Lay Dying treatment, and at first I wasn't keen on it. That said, two of the things that really put me off Slayer are Tom Araya's vocals and Kerry King's pretty uninspiring solos, neither of which are in evidence here, and that really helps. The track really benefits from modern production values and a lower tuning, giving it a real in-your-face kick that I feel is missing in the original. With the drums really pounding it's easy to forget that this song is nearly 5 minutes long (the AILD version clocks in at 4:51, exactly the same as the original). The more I listen to it, the more I like it - which is something I've never said for... well, anything Slayer have recorded. A good opener for the album.

2. Fight The Power - The Dillinger Escape Plan feat. Chuck D
Does it count as a cover if you're getting the original singer to put vocals down? Simply put, yes. When I saw that Dillinger had covered this I wondered if I'd be able to recognise it, and I'm not sure I would have done until the chorus kicked in (even knowing the lyrics). Dillinger really make this song their own, but in amongst the wall of noise that they make you can still hear Public Enemy. Which will have something to do with Chuck D being on the track, won't it? I love how well the two genres - the math- noise of Dillinger and the hiphop funk of PE - mash together. If you skip to around two minutes in, when the song moves away from blast beats and Greg screaming his lungs out you'll hear how brilliantly it works. I'll be listening to this a lot.

3. Uprising - iwrestledabearonce
I've always felt like iwrestledabearonce are trying a little too hard to be Rolo Tomassi, and they're just not as good at it. This is a cracking version of a sub-par Muse song, though; the bass is filthy in all the right places and Krysta's voice works perfectly. On this song she reminds me of a I Touch Myself-era Debbie Harry, and that's no bad thing. I was expecting to hear this song math-d up, the same as Dillinger did to parts of Fight The Power, and I'm glad they didn't. Yes, it descends into screams and blast beats about 3 minutes in, but the groove keeps going all the way through and that's really what this song is all about. Solid effort, though it doesn't bring much new to the table.

4. War Pigs - The Acacia Strain
Black Sabbath were the first band I fell in love with, back when I was about 6 years old, and War Pigs is one of the first songs I remember learning to play. I discovered Faith No More not long after that, and their version of this song is one of my all-time favourite covers. So The Acacia Strain had a lot to live up to here, for me at least. They didn't manage it. Musically it's pretty true to the original - obviously made heavier in places, and the bridge is given the soaring metalcore treatment, and with Vincent's growl over the top. That's the problem for me. The changes to the arrangement weaken the song rather than strengthening it, and I really struggle to take death metal growls seriously. Sorry guys. Skip.

5. One - Periphery
This impressed me from the word go. It's post-rocky and glitchy and just huge-sounding to start, and Spencer's vocals suit it perfectly. The heavier parts at the end of the verses don't work very well - they stick out musically; I'm not sure if it's a production issue or just that it plain doesn't work, but it just sounds flat. Once the second solo has been and gone and we move into the heavy part that everybody knows from One, though, those issues have vanished. The second half of the song is huge and aggressive and almost identical to the original, which really is what that part of the song needed. And juxtaposed with the glitchy, almost ethereal opening, it just plain works. Awesome.

6. Fortunate Son - The Ghost Inside
Creedence Clearwater Revival don't get enough credit. Fortunate Son is an awesome song. Unfortunately The Ghost Inside manage to make it sound like any other mid-tempo not-much-to-it hardcore song. That's a shame, because they're a good band and it's a great song. It gets better when they drop the tempo round about the 1:40 mark, but by that point the damage has already been done. Instantly forgettable.

7. For What It's Worth - Winds Of Plague
I'll admit that I didn't know the original song or Winds Of Plague before I heard this. Having now listened to both of them, I can safely say I prefer Buffalo Springfield's version. The two notes that ring out throughout the entire song grated on me after about thirty seconds in Winds Of Plague's version; in the original they're nice and soothing and really pull all the instrumentation together. What I also realised when listening to the original is that I've heard it before, because I knew the chorus. I didn't spot it in the cover; WoP have managed to strip this song of everything that's good about the original and make it just another metal cover.

8. Us And Them - Misery Signals
I was ready to tear this to pieces, because Pink Floyd covers very rarely gel well with me. Especially after how disappointing the last couple of songs on the album had been, I was anticipating really hating this. Luckily, Misery Signals pulled a blinder here. I didn't think I'd ever enjoy a Pink Floyd song given the metalcore treatment, but they keep it to a minimum here. The screaming is minimal and is used in the right places, and even when they rock it up they still somehow manage to keep the dreamy, epic quality that runs through pretty much anything on Dark Side Of The Moon. There's some impressive drumming towards the end, too, and that always wins me over. This just saved the second half of this album for me.

9. Masters Of War - Arsonists Get All The Girls
 No compilation of war songs would be complete without some Bob Dylan, would it? This version starts off well, sounding a lot like Pearl Jam's version, and when the screaming kicks in it works. At first. Then it turns into the kind of metal that I really don't like - technical, and fast, with a couple of breakdowns and some synth but with no feeling behind it. This would have benefitted from the same kind of treatment as Misery Signals gave Us and Them, because here all the meaning of the song is lost. Even the switch into lounge-funk-jazz at around three minutes in can't save it.

10. War - Oceano
How Oceano managed to pull this off I'll never know. It's discordant and in your face, pig squeals all over the place, and doesn't have any of the camp cheesiness that every other Edwin Starr cover ever has been filled with, yet the song survives despite the very deliberate mangling its given. Given how much I usually hate this kind of metal, its testament to how well Oceano do it that I love this version of the song. It's probably because the guitars are interestng throughout, and Adam sounds like his tearing himself a new esophagus. That, and I'm a sucker for a really, really good inward scream. Which he has.

11. Sunday Bloody Sunday - Veil Of Maya
Another admission; I don't like U2, and I dislike this song even moreso. Especially after hearing this.

To be brutally honest, I'm glad I didn't pay for this album. There's some good tracks on it - most of the first half I really liked - but there's also some complete rubbish. Which I suppose is the way all metal covers go, really, and a whole album of them was never going to be a complete winner. Still, there's more on it than I enjoyed than on some compilation CDs that I have paid for (Masters of Horror soundtrack, I'm looking at you) so I can't really complain. The good songs are very good, and the bad ones - for the most part - are just a bit meh rather than truly bad. If you can get hold of a copy, do. But what would be even better would be to make a playlist of the 11 original songs, because that would be great. Although feel free to keep the Dillinger track there instead.

Verdict: 6/10 - Download it here [if there are any left]

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Sucker Punch

I saw the trailer for Sucker Punch - Zack Snyder's new film, released this week - what feels like years ago, and I remember thinking it looked ridiculous in all the right ways. I've just seen the 'Reanimation' video that's doing the rounds, and now I really want to see this film. Yes, it's going to be a 12A, when from the trailers and everything I've heard it really needs to be a 15 or an 18 to do full justice to the concept, but I still want to see it. It just looks like pure entertainment, and I'm definitely a fan of that. Plus, Snyder just makes gorgeous films.

Here's the video, if you're interested. The full trailer is here.

Thursday, 17 March 2011

Embassytown

Pan Macmillan have released the Prologue and first chapter of China Mieville's new novel, Embassytown. I'm a big fan of China's work, and this looks to be just as weird and fascinating as his other novels. The UK release date for the book is May 6th, and it can't come fast enough!

You can read the extract here.

Nerd Bucket List

The Nerd Bucket List has been doing the rounds of Twitter this morning, so I thought I'd join in. There's not much on the Tumblr yet but hopefully it will grow. It's a pretty cool idea and Tumblr and Twitter are perfect for it. You know, because they're both full of nerds.

Anyway. I got to thinking. I've already done quite a lot of stuff that, to me, is really cool. I've been to SDCC (which is one of the only things on the Tumblr); I've met Neil Gaiman, Joss Whedon and half the cast of Firefly. Dave McKean has signed stuff for me and chatted to Ben Templesmith and Anthony Johnston about the shitty little town we both (Anthony and I, that is) live in. Or lived. He may have moved. I wouldn't blame him. I got out of there. I've also sold chocolate to Christoper Eccleston, been for dinner with Patrick Rothfuss and seen Pete Postlethwaite on stage.

There's loads more I'd like to do, though. So without further ado, here's ten items from my nerd bucket list.

  1. Have a story appear in an anthology alongside Neil Gaiman. This isn't just on my nerd bucket list, this is a life ambition.
  2. Be an extra in a comic book film. They were filming Captain America around the corner from my old flat, and while I went and strolled through the set I didn't have the courage to go and watch filming and try and get in on the action. Next time anything like that is in town, though, I'll be there.
  3. Get a sketch by Dave McKean, Charles Vess or Yoshitaka Amano. Pretty self explanatory, really.
  4. Get a tattoo designed for me by one of the above. I'm also going to add Ben Templesmith and Michael Zulli to the list. Having a tattoo designed for me by any artist who's work I love would be awesome, though.
  5. Be the voice of a video game character. Come on, Lionshead. You know you want me for Fable 4.
  6. Own a House Of The Dead arcade machine. My birthday is coming up in June. Put that on your list.
  7. Have a series of action figures made from something I've written. Because that would just be cool. And it gives me an excuse to make up weird monsters.
  8. Play D&D with Wil Wheaton. Need I say more?
  9. Appear in an episode of The Guild. I'm not an actor. Still, that would be cool.
  10. Do a roadtrip of all the weird places in American Godsp. If you don't know what this means then you need to read American Gods. Obviously. Go do it.
So that's it. There's a lot more on the actual list (which is in my head). What's on yours?

    Monday, 14 March 2011

    Time Capsule Mansion

    I know, two posts in one day. In an hour. Annoying. But I had to share this. I've just read on the National Geographic website about a house that was sealed up when it's owner died. In his will he asked that nobody open it for a century after his death, after which it should be open to the public. It was opened in October, and you should see some of the things inside!

    The full article is available online here. Go take a look.

    Shaun Tan and The Lost Thing

    If you don't know Shaun Tan's work, you've been missing out. He writes and illustrates books that are ostensibly for children, but really go far beyond that. The Arrival, for example, is a picture book about a man arriving in a foreign city, a an alien world of weird Cthulu-esque creatures that he doesn't fit in to. The story is haunting and moving, told entirely through pictures, and the artwork is stunning.

    I've only just gotten around to watching 'The Lost Thing', the film he made of his book of the same name that took home an Oscar for Best Short Animated Film. It's funny, and beautiful, and it will make you think about the way you live your life. Watch it here, then go and buy his books.  

    Sunday, 13 March 2011

    Easy like a Sunday morning

    I'm in the car at the crack of dawn going to Birmingham for Crufts. This is not my idea of a good time. A) its early and I'd rather be asleep and b) I'm going to a dog show and I'm allergic to dogs. Plus I just don't like them. Oh well.

    I have a notebook and my ipod with me, so I'm sure I can find a secluded corner and pretend I'm not in my own private hell. I've also got a bag full of antihistemines with me.
    ***
    Chapter 2 has been sent out to readers and I'm about halfway through the third. I should hit 10k words today, which will be nice. I can't update the wordcount bar from my phone, but that's not important. The important bit is that I'm writing and enjoying it and people seem to like it. Fingers crossed that continues.

    Monday, 7 March 2011

    Getting my write on

    I've started work on a new novel (you may remember I blogged about plotting it a while ago). This is the first time I've written from a plot, so it should be interesting. Hopefully I won't get stuck halfway through and end up scrapping the whole thing like I usually do.

    I've got my beta readers ready (thanks!) and I've promised them the first chapter today. I'd best go finish it really!

    And, if you're interested, there's now a word count meter at the right of this page. Hopefully that will continue to rise as I write more. The goal of 120k words is a little arbitrary at the moment, but it's something to aim for. Now to hit it.

    Thursday, 3 March 2011

    The Wise Man's Fear

    I'm writing this on my phone on a train going to Cardiff. I love Android; every now and then it reminds me that I'm living in the future.

    Avyway. On Tuesday I bought The Wise Man's Fear by Patrick Rothfuss. I've been waiting 4 years for this book. I finished it last night.

    It's good. Very good. Not as enthralling as The Name Of The Wind (the first book in this projected trilogy) but still better than most. It suffers from middle-of-the-series syndrome, in that there's necessarily a lot going on that will set up events for the final book.

    It's also not as tense in places as it deserves to be. There's some dangerous, dramatic stuff happening to Kvothe here, but the problem is we know he's sitting in an inn telling this story years later. It's hard to worry that the Adem will cut off his thumbs or kill him when we know he's whole and alive in the future.

    Despite that, its a great read. It doesn't feel like a 900+ page book. It clips along at a hell of a pace. I actually think it would have benefitted from being longer. Some of the events are obviously of massive importance, but there's so much going on here that I sometimes felt like things were being skimmed over; in places it felt episodic, almost picaresque, a sequence of events that don't seem to have much connection. That lends a lot of reality to the story though, in a way; this is Kvothe telling the story of his life, and how else do we remember our lives but as unconnected events?

    Having said all that, though, its a solid, enjoyable book. I could spend a lot longer in this world with these characters and Pat's writing is a joy to read. If you haven't read The Name Of The Wind, you should. It was the best fantasy book of 2007. Then read this. Hopefully the wait for book 3 won't be as long, but if it is then so be it. I'm definitely looking forward to the next installment.